It’s a Boooooooook!
Hi friends!
So, I’ve been threatening to reveal my next book, and HERE IT IS!
Nell and the Netherbeast is about a kid who wants more than anything to have a delightful pet of her own, but unfortunately ends up with the Netherbeast, who mostly pretends to be a cat and is super disgusting and horrible. To make matters worse, Nell and the Netherbeast are forced to spend the summer working at Aunt Jerry’s B&B with Nell’s annoying older sister. To make matters EVEN WORSE, it turns out there is a very grumpy ghost in the rumpus room, who keeps throwing tantrums and peeling the wallpaper and making the portraits cry and exploding the piano. Can Nell and the Netherbeast solve the ghost problem before a pair of world-famous travel influencers descend on the B&B with their devastating reviews at the ready?
So. I LOVE THIS COVER SO MUCH.
The artist is the amazing Ash Szymanik, who did the illustrations, and the designer is the amazing Tiffany Meairs. Those teeny magenta stars? They’re not magenta. They’re going to be gold foil. I have never had gold foil on a book cover. All I can do is promise to wield this unfathomable new power for good. Or, you know, evil. Whichever.
The colors in the Nell and the Netherbeast cover bring me back to the 70s, and it’s like I’m just rolling around in crocheted afghans and slapping Scooby Doo stickers on my wood-panel walls. I did not grow up in the 70s, but in my childhood environment, the 70s were still happening. And I love them. I still listen to vinyl and use my grandmother’s dangerous kitchen appliances and long for manual car windows. One of my stupid hobbies is re-creating Columbo sets in The Sims.
If you would like to preorder Nell and the Netherbeast, there are some links here at the S&S website, including Indiebound, or you can find it through your local bookseller! Quick plug for preorders: they are super-super important for a book’s “numbers,” which are a super-super important part of the author getting to publish more books.
If you would rather live a Netherbeast-free life, and let’s face it, that’s not the wrong choice, instead please enjoy this screenshot from my Sims 4 game when a master vampire showed up at the outdoor werewolf bar for no reason whatsoever and insisted on staying there all night chatting up the werewolves and then DIED IN THE SUN and everyone got sad about it for some reason.
Cat News
Possible super powers: Our little-old-man-cat Scooter has some little-old-man-cat issues, and now there are radioactive chicken treats in my fridge.
And besides that, at the end of March, he’s going in for a “nuclear medicine treatment.” We’ll have to keep his radioactive turds in a sealed bucket outside for like three months until they’re safe to introduce into the ecosystem.
Sunshine Bunshine news: I was so optimistic about Sunshine’s diet in my last newsletter. Ha ha ha! Then Scooter needed to start free-feeding because he’s got to put on some pounds in anticipation of his nuclear medicine treatment, so Sunshine has been free-feeding as well…like, very, very freely feeding. All the time. All the food. And the more he eats, the more he wants. He’s an orange black hole. We’ve broached the subject with the vet, who says it’s more important for Scooter to gain weight first, and we’ll deal with Sunshine afterwards.
Friends, he is a hangry bowling ball.
I’ll keep you updated. If the next newsletter comes from Sunshine, you’ll know the humans have been devoured. But, I mean, don’t let that deter you from giving his life advice a chance. He’s done okay so far.
I hope you’re looking forward to spring! We hit -41 wind chill here and there are definitely better ways to have fun. The chickens did get to move into the garage for the weekend, so that was a mind-blowing adventure for them.
Thanks for reading! Happy creating to you. Let me know how it’s going, or how your pets are doing, or what games you’re playing.